Life is a rollercoaster

Inspiration shot August 2025

What if a low point, a magical high,
and AI bring the same lesson?

My theater show was a true transition, and the weeks that followed felt like a rollercoaster without brakes. Big highs, deep lows, and insights that felt like sandpaper, yet opened new doors. In this Inspiration Shot, I’ll take you along to:

  • an unexpected low point that turned everything upside down
  • a magical high that changed the meaning of love and time
  • and how AI helped me find the connection between the two, revealing new lessons about control, surrender, and trust.

Join me on my rollercoaster? It will probably give you some insight and tools for your own ride.

📸 Magazine pics thanks to @Ellenvanbennekom and @SaarMagazine

When your foundation falls away

The day after my theater show, the operational backbone of my business unexpectedly gave way.

I was still floating on a post-show cloud, and this pulled me back to earth with a jolt. I panicked.

Instead of easing into a softer phase, I found myself in extreme action mode: trying to get an overview of all the systems and processes, transferring tasks, and figuring out what needed to happen first. It felt like the ground had shifted overnight.

Over the past 1,5 month, I’ve tried to rise above survival mode and reframe what’s happening. And I’ve come to a simple but powerful conclusion: it’s time to let go, even more than I thought. Simplify. Automate. Outsource. Trust.

This transition goes deeper than business logistics. It’s also personal. I’m learning to sit with what is, instead of rushing to fix or control what I can’t influence. Slowly, a stillness is emerging underneath the chaos.

The truth is, change rarely comes on our terms. But sometimes the very thing that shakes us is exactly what we need to move forward.

When time and space dissolve

That same week, I had a flashback to the moment I met my twin soul.

When our eyes met, time disappeared.
The world around us vanished.
An hour felt like an eternity, and an eternity like a second.
I had never seen him before, yet I instantly knew him.
Even before a single word was spoken, I felt his energy.
I saw glimpses of other lives where our paths had already crossed.
It wasn’t love at first sight, it was recognition.
In just 24 hours we found each other (again) and then had to let go once more.
That brief encounter changed how I experience love, connection, and even the meaning of time.

I wrote a blog about it, the most extraordinary love story I’ve ever experienced.
👉 Can love exist beyond time and space?

When worlds collide

I felt there had to be a lesson hidden in these two completely opposite events and the emotions they stirred in me: disappointment, frustration, sadness, trust issues, loss of control and fear, versus unconditional love, surrender, acceptance and deep trust.

I talked about it with… ChatGPT. And it helped me see the underlying patterns, old wounds, and the connection between the two. Just like my personal journey over the past years and my theater show, this was also about transitioning from masculine energy (productivity and control) toward feminine energy (softness and surrender).

The energy of the encounter with my twin soul showed me that I can leave old patterns behind, and that even in challenging circumstances, I can move toward surrender, love and flow. So I get to practice that now, daily, in real life…

It’s amazing how sharp ChatGPT can be if you give it enough input and good prompts. In my latest column for Intermediair, I share concrete examples you can try yourself:

👉 Discover yourself with 10 powerful AI prompts for more self-awareness

Inspiration bites

VIDEO
Total pixel space

This award-winning 9-minute film shows how all possible images (and therefore all events) already exist, beyond time and space. It touches the same theme of timelessness and recognition I felt when meeting my twin soul.

VIDEO
Do our prompts create real worlds?

This video shows what happens when you feed AI negative scenarios: virtual beings experience them as if they were real. It raises the question whether our imagination, through AI, creates new realities that are truly felt.

INTERVIEW
Living off the wind

A full 16-page interview about fear, control, freedom, and so much more.

See the stunning photos taken in Mallorca, partly at my ‘neighbor’s’ beautiful Osa Major.

The summer edition of Saar Magazine is still available in Dutch stores.

RECORDING
Theater Show

2,5 hours, 40 scenes, 500 captivated participants. Curious about my theater show after hearing all the enthusiastic stories?

Now with English subtitles! Only this month, you can still purchase the livestream recording and receive a free e-book of your choice.

Did you know...?

… that I have dreamed my entire life about war, disasters, fleeing, hiding, surviving? 

Maybe it’s because I come from a Jewish family, where 53 family members never returned from the war. There were always stories about hiding, betrayal, concentration camps, resistance. I have a very strong survival instinct and have lived most of my life in ‘survival mode’. That’s when I’m at my best. If something ever happens to the earth, I will do everything I can to survive.

My participation in the European Survivor reality TV show in 2005 was disappointing in that sense. It was more about group psychology than survival. Then again, maybe that’s what it ultimately comes down to.

I don’t watch much TV, but when I do, it’s usually a documentary or series connected to this theme. I recently found another one: The Collapse (L’Effondrement). Eight short episodes with different scenarios. I find them realistic, interesting, and unsettling. What would you do?

Where is Esther?

A week after my theater show, I flew to London for a Dynamite Circle conference and then visited friends in Paris. And now? I’m back in the Netherlands until the end of August.

The rollercoaster of the past weeks called not only for insights but also for… a pause. To slow down, breathe, and feel.

On Monday evenings you’ll find me on the beach in Zandvoort for Happy Monday Beach Tango; dancing with the sunset and the sea as my backdrop. I’m also diving into drawing classes and creative experiments like making collages. Stepping away from productivity, back into play and creation. I’m also decluttering; literally (like my wardrobe): and figuratively.

In September, I’ll be in Puglia, my place of silence, nature, and inspiration.

Wherever I am, the theme remains the same: creating space, feeling what truly matters, and following the flow. Because sometimes life’s rollercoaster doesn’t ask you to hold on tighter, but to let go, pause and feel where you are now.

Want to stay inspired while I regroup? My inspiration and tips are always available through my workshop packages.

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